Written and edited by Shariffah Nadia
A Dad’s Dream to Change
An ex-offender’s only wish of getting back into the arms of his family, all for the sole reason of making them happy.
A five-storey building, dedicated training and counselling rooms, prayer rooms and many others - all to serve the cause of helping ex-drug addicts or ‘residents’ of Pertapis Halfway Home.
The residents comprise of those in their twenties to elderly. But as the saying goes, “It is never too late to get help.”Just like a father who was sent here around five weeks ago, his ultimate goal is to rise up again and earn a decent living for his wife and four kids.
“I would always be envious when I see dads holding their kids and wife’s hands walking around. I want to do that someday,” mentioned Aliff (not his real name), a 45-year-old resident in the Pertapis Halfway House.
Looking back at the past month of living in the halfway house, he has now became more disciplined whereby he is taught to religiously undergo the five prayers of a Muslim believer. As a dad and leader of the household, he ultimately has to lead his family in prayers.
“It is indeed a cultural change as back then, I did not really perform my duties (as a Muslim),” Aliff said with a strained voice while clutching his hands together.
THE WISH TO TURN BACK TIME
Aliff started out on drugs at the age of 17 due to peer pressure. Missing out on his teenage years, he wishes that there was someone who had guided him to the right path back then. “I’ve tried going to the right path many times, but nothing seems to make me stop depending on them (drugs),” he said.
The residents comprise of those in their twenties to elderly. But as the saying goes, “It is never too late to get help.”Just like a father who was sent here around five weeks ago, his ultimate goal is to rise up again and earn a decent living for his wife and four kids.
“I would always be envious when I see dads holding their kids and wife’s hands walking around. I want to do that someday,” mentioned Aliff (not his real name), a 45-year-old resident in the Pertapis Halfway House.
Looking back at the past month of living in the halfway house, he has now became more disciplined whereby he is taught to religiously undergo the five prayers of a Muslim believer. As a dad and leader of the household, he ultimately has to lead his family in prayers.
“It is indeed a cultural change as back then, I did not really perform my duties (as a Muslim),” Aliff said with a strained voice while clutching his hands together.
THE WISH TO TURN BACK TIME
Aliff started out on drugs at the age of 17 due to peer pressure. Missing out on his teenage years, he wishes that there was someone who had guided him to the right path back then. “I’ve tried going to the right path many times, but nothing seems to make me stop depending on them (drugs),” he said.
With one of his kids currently in their teenage years, he is afraid of them not making the right decisions in life. According to research done by Harvard Magazine, it has indeed shown that youths are commonly curious and easily influenced by their environment and are more prone to impulsive behaviour - the trap in which Aliff fell for in his early days.
“Don’t be curious, once you start trying it, you won’t stop. Before you consider doing the act, if you know it is wrong, don’t do it.” - Aliff,45
PAVING NEW PATHS
While most parents would wish that their children would follow their footsteps, Aliff has other plans.
“I will counsel him hard, and apply what I have learnt here to instill discipline in him,” replied Aliff, when asked what he would do if he finds out his eldest son whom he claims to be rebellious eventually ends up becoming an addict too.
Needless to say, it is agreeable that such acts like smoking and drinking are unhealthy traits that every parent would not want their kids to be influenced by. Everyone has a long-time dream but as time goes by, they may be crushed by life’s obstacles. For Aliff, all he dreams now is to ultimately be a good father.
A close friend and resident of Pertapis Halfway House, Adam (not real name), 29, shares, "I have always dreamt to be a musician, thankfully here we get to jam with other musicians who are also residents here."
Apart from just lifetime dreams, he adds on how he has missed out many family gatherings which includes the death of his grandmother. "At that point of time, i felt helpless in my bunk but, all my brothers here are always here and music brought us all together and i am currently in the process of writing a song for my late grandmother," said Adam.
THE FEAR
To him, weekly Sunday coming-home sessions lasting from ten to 12 hours with his family, is the most precious of all. It acts as an assurance that once he is back in society, he would do everything to make his family happy.
Apart from just returning as a more responsible father to his family, he worries of potential relapse. However, studies have shown that there has been a decrease in the percentage of relapses of ex-offenders in Singapore.
Aliff believes that it is easy to be re-integrated back into society but all he wants now is for his family to accept him for his past.
While most parents would wish that their children would follow their footsteps, Aliff has other plans.
“I will counsel him hard, and apply what I have learnt here to instill discipline in him,” replied Aliff, when asked what he would do if he finds out his eldest son whom he claims to be rebellious eventually ends up becoming an addict too.
Needless to say, it is agreeable that such acts like smoking and drinking are unhealthy traits that every parent would not want their kids to be influenced by. Everyone has a long-time dream but as time goes by, they may be crushed by life’s obstacles. For Aliff, all he dreams now is to ultimately be a good father.
A close friend and resident of Pertapis Halfway House, Adam (not real name), 29, shares, "I have always dreamt to be a musician, thankfully here we get to jam with other musicians who are also residents here."
Apart from just lifetime dreams, he adds on how he has missed out many family gatherings which includes the death of his grandmother. "At that point of time, i felt helpless in my bunk but, all my brothers here are always here and music brought us all together and i am currently in the process of writing a song for my late grandmother," said Adam.
THE FEAR
To him, weekly Sunday coming-home sessions lasting from ten to 12 hours with his family, is the most precious of all. It acts as an assurance that once he is back in society, he would do everything to make his family happy.
Apart from just returning as a more responsible father to his family, he worries of potential relapse. However, studies have shown that there has been a decrease in the percentage of relapses of ex-offenders in Singapore.
Aliff believes that it is easy to be re-integrated back into society but all he wants now is for his family to accept him for his past.